I read Jay Asher's novel TH1RTEEN R3ASONS WHY over the last week.
I could not put it down! I had to find out the reasons Hannah left for why she committed suicide and what Clay did. I watched the Netflix series first season back in 2017 when it came out. I didn't remember much from the series and never watched the following seasons because I met my husband and had to find shows that he would also enjoy; I didn't think he would like a teen television series.
The book follows one night with Clay Jensen listening to the tapes that Hannah left to be passed from student to student, revealing the terrible things these students had done.
Immediately, I noticed the book differed from the Netflix series in that the whole book takes place in less than 24 hours time following Clay Jensen. We follow him to each of the locations Hannah marks on the map she left in his locker (also different from the series).
The book and Netflix series carry controversy with them.
The book carries a sense of innocence that makes it easier to get through than the Netflix series is. The book talks about parties and some wild things, but there is not such a sexual nature as the series has.
But the real controversy comes from if suicide is a valid option for people. If other's actions really have anything to do with someone else's suicide.
I felt that part of the book did a great job of showing that it was ultimately Hannah's choice to take her own life and no one could have stopped her. She decided. She chose not to accept anyone else's love and affection. So many of the characters loved and care for her, but in their own ways. They shamed her and hurt her.
I remember being a teenager. I remember everything being the end of the world. I am on anti-depressants now and I need them to not feel like things are the end of the world. I feel that I have the healthiest outlook on life that I have ever had because I can see that the pain others caused me had very little to do with me. No one is really that absorbed in my life, just me.
One thing I would have loved to see is Jay Asher has written an alternative book with a happy ending. Where all the same things happened to Hannah, but she made different choices and let other's help her. That she let a great guy like Clay love her and become her boyfriend, that she went off to the college of her dreams.
I remember when I watched the series, just waiting for Hannah to be like "just kidding, I am here in hiding now, you can all apologize to me and fix your behavior." But I guess that is my strong craving for a happy ending to everything. Realistically, many things happen in life that never have a happy ending. I've lived through many of them, myself and my dreams are filled with fixes of those messes, that my best friend was waiting for me and missing me, rather than wanting nothing to do with me for the rest of my life.
I personally feel that I read dirtier books when I was in high school and middle school than this book. I was obsessed with the Gossip Girl series of books and I remember partying and drugs, alcohol use and sex being depicted. That changed nothing for me, I was an innocent child until I was 17 years old, despite having read the books from 13 onward. I think "Thirteen Reasons Why" is not anything to shy away from sharing with children 12 and older. It is a book I would not mind sharing with my future daughter.
I would, however, then want to have an open discussion with her about the contents of the book. To speak with her about rape, sex, bullying, and suicide. I would need her to know that these are all part of the world, unfortunately. As much as I would love to shelter her from it, that wouldn't help at all. I remember being 13 and having the craziest conversations with my friends. Even at Catholic Heart Work Camp when I was 15, I remember discussing suicide. I remember that I felt depressed during that time in my life too because I didn't fit in anywhere.
I didn't fit in anywhere my whole life. That has never changed, but you know what? I feel wonderful about that now as a 28-year-old woman. My husband and I have the life that we want and I know that we would annoy anyone who spends time with us. We talk during movies, argue for the sake of arguing, are loud and silly. But I am exactly where I want to be in my life. I am accepted for who I am by everyone in my life. That is a great feeling.
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